One of the most desirable attitudes of a leader is an ability to view problems as opportunities and setbacks as temporary inconveniences. This positive attitude also welcomes change as friendly and is not upset by surprises, even negative ones. How we approach challenges and problems is a crucial aspect of our decision making process, whether in business or in our personal lives. In companies and environments in which criticism, pessimism, cynicism and motivation by fear prevail, an attitude develops that leads to avoiding failure at all costs. The trouble with failure avoidance is that it’s simultaneously avoidance of success, which depends on big risks.

Innovation and creativity are impossible when people are in fear of being penalized for failure.

Early experience often teaches that failure is to be avoided at all costs. This begins in childhood, when we encounter the first “No!!” It grows like a weed when we are criticized by our parents, other family members, our teachers and our peers. It leads to associating ourselves with our mistakes, and to a self-image of clumsiness and awkwardness. Not wanting to be criticized or rejected, many adults also seek security rather than risk looking foolish or appearing awkward. They quietly ride with the system, not rocking the boat.

All lasting success in life is laced with problems and misfortunes which require creativity and innovation. Winners turn stumbling blocks into steppingstones.

In the 1920s, when Ernest Hemingway was working hard to perfect his craft, he lost a suitcase containing all his manuscripts. The devastated Hemingway couldn’t conceive of redoing his work. He could think only of the months he’d devoted to his arduous writing—and for nothing, he was now convinced.

But when he lamented his loss to poet Ezra Pound, Pound called it a stroke of luck. Pound assured Hemingway that when he rewrote the stories, he would forget the weak parts and only the best material would reappear. Instead of framing the event in disappointment, Pound cast it in the light of opportunity. Hemingway did rewrite the stories, and the rest, as they say, is history.

This week, concentrate on framing your challenges as “opportunities to grow” rather than “disappointments and problems.”
—Denis Waitley

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When asked, “How do you develop mental toughness in life?” my response might sound negative at first. I answer, “Always be prepared for a surprise. The surprise might be a negative surprise. Something is going to happen in your day, whether you are late because you got stuck behind a train or your car had a flat tire—something is going to happen. And the key is your ability not to take mole hills and look at them as mountains.”

Problems are a normal part of change. Things are changing so rapidly that there are going to be problems you face. So you must look at failure as an event, not as a person. I’m not a failure. Maybe I’ve had a failure or a temporary inconvenience. I’ve had a stumbling block, and the idea is to turn the stumbling block into a steppingstone, and step on it instead of stumble over it. So look at failure as the fertilizer of success.

Fertilizer stinks, it smells. You see that guy putting it on his lawn and you say, “Wow, that guy fertilized his lawn.” You fertilize your mistakes. You don’t wallow in them, lay in them, roll in them; you pick yourself up off your mistakes and learn from them. You try not to repeat that same thing again. But you look at it as a temporary inconvenience, as a detour—a detour in life—not as a failure.

—Denis Waitley

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Many times, we look at high achievers and assume they had a string of lucky breaks or made it without much effort. Usually, the opposite is true, and the so-called superstar had an incredibly rough time before he or she attained any lasting success.

It may motivate you more toward your own goals to know that some of the most famous and well-known people in modern times had to overcome as difficult obstacles as anyone before they finally reached the top It takes persistence and total commitment to your goals, but it's possible!

You may not know the background of a certain laundry worker who earned sixty dollars a week at his job but had the burning desire to be a writer. His wife worked nights, and he spent nights and weekends typing manuscripts to send to publishers and agents. Each one was rejected with a form letter that gave him no assurance that his manuscripts had even been read. I've received a few of those special valentines myself through the years, and I can tell you first hand that they're not the greatest self-esteem builders.

But finally, a warm, more personal rejection letter came in the mail to the laundry worker, stating that although his work was not good enough at this point to warrant publishing, he had promise as a writer and he should keep trying.

He forwarded two more manuscripts to the same friendly-yet-rejecting publisher over the next eighteen months, and as before, he struck out with both of them too. Finances got so tight for the young couple that they had to disconnect their telephone to pay for medicine for their baby.

Feeling totally discouraged, he threw his latest manuscript into the garbage. His wife, totally committed to his life goals and believing in his talent, took the manuscript out of the trash and sent it back to Doubleday, the publisher who had sent the friendly rejections. The book, titled Carrie, sold over five million copies, and as a movie, became one of the top-grossing films in 1976. The laundry worker, of course, was Stephen King.

The main message - believe in your ability to turn obstacles into opportunities. Too often people try to storm their obstacles as if they're forts that need to be taken. It's better to step back and ask yourself: "Did I cause this obstacle by my own actions or lack of them? Did someone else cause this obstacle? Is this obstacle one that grew out of the natural progression of circumstances?"

This last question may seem complex, but it holds a secret to the way you can set and reach your goals and achieve your destiny!

-- Denis Waitley

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You may have heard the story about the analogy of the "circus juggler" to each of us as we try to balance our personal and professional priorities. I have heard the story repeated by many keynote speakers and have used it in previous books, but have never been able to trace the identity of the original author.

When the circus juggler drops a ball, he lets it bounce and picks it up on the next bounce without losing his rhythm or concentration. He keeps right on juggling. Many times we do the same thing. We lose our jobs, but get another one on the first or second bounce. We may drop the ball on a sale, an opportunity to move ahead, or in a relationship, and we either pick it up on the rebound or get a new one thrown in to replace what we just dropped.

However, some of the balls or priorities we juggle don't bounce. The more urgent priorities associated with self-imposed deadlines and workloads have more elasticity than the precious, delicate relationships which are as fragile as fine crystal. Balance involves distinguishing between the priorities we juggle that bounce from the ones labeled "loved ones," "health," and "moral character" that may shatter if we drop them.

The reason I always ask my seminar attendees to list the benefits of reaching their goals is so they can arrange them in the true order of importance to them, and give them a sufficient amount of attention as they juggle them within their time constraints.

Handle your priorities with care. Some of them just don't bounce!

-- Denis Waitley

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...time and health are two precious assets that we rarely recognize or appreciate until they have been depleted. As with health, time is the raw material of life. You can use it wisely, waste it or even kill it.

To accomplish all we are capable of, we would need a hundred lifetimes. If we had forever in our mortal lives, there would be no need to set goals, plan effectively or set priorities. We could squander our time and perhaps still manage to accomplish something, if only by chance. Yet in reality, we're given only this one life span on earth to do our earthly best.

Each human being now living has exactly 168 hours per week. Scientists can't invent new minutes, and even the super rich can't buy more hours. Queen Elizabeth the First of England, the richest, most powerful woman on earth of her era, whispered these final words on her deathbed: "All my possessions for a moment of time!"


We worry about things we want to do - but can't - instead of doing the things we can do - but don't. How often have you said to yourself, "Where did the day go? I accomplished nothing," or "I can't even remember what I did yesterday." That time is gone, and you never get it back.

Staring at the compelling distractions on a television screen is one of the major consumers of time. You can enjoy and benefit from the very best it has to offer in about seven total hours of viewing per week. But the average person spends more than thirty hours per week in a semi-stupor, escaping from the priorities and goals he or she never gets around to setting. The irony is that the people we are watching are having fun achieving their own goals, making money, having us look at them enjoying their careers.

Even so, time is amazingly fair and forgiving. No matter how much time you've wasted in the past, you still have an entire today. If you've just frittered away an hour procrastinating, you will still be given the next hour to start on priorities. Time management contains one great paradox: No one has enough time, and yet everyone has all there is. Time is not the problem; the problem is separating the urgent from the important.

This week separate the urgent from the important and take action on what is important!

by Denis Waitley

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Following are six behaviors that increase self-esteem, enhance your self-confidence, and spur your motivation. You may recognize some of them as things you naturally do in your interactions with other people. But if you don't, I suggest you motivate yourself to take some of these important steps immediately.

First, greet others with a smile and look them directly in the eye. A smile and direct eye contact convey confidence born of self-respect. In the same way, answer the phone pleasantly whether at work or at home, and when placing a call, give your name before asking to speak to the party you want to reach. Leading with your name underscores that a person with self-respect is making the call.

Second, always show real appreciation for a gift or complement. Don't downplay or sidestep expressions of affection or honor from others. The ability to accept or receive is a universal mark of an individual with solid self-esteem.

Third, don't brag. It's almost a paradox that genuine modesty is actually part of the capacity to gracefully receive compliments. People who brag about their own exploits or demand special attention are simply trying to build themselves up in the eyes of others — and that's because they don't perceive themselves as already worthy of respect.

Fourth, don't make your problems the centerpiece of your conversation. Talk positively about your life and the progress you're trying to make. Be aware of any negative thinking, and take notice of how often you complain. When you hear yourself criticize someone — and this includes self-criticism — find a way to be helpful instead of critical.

Fifth, respond to difficult times or depressing moments by increasing your level of productive activity. When your self-esteem is being challenged, don't sit around and fall victim to “paralysis by analysis.’ The late Malcolm Forbes said, “Vehicles in motion use their generators to charge their own batteries. Unless you happen to be a golf cart, you can't recharge your battery when you're parked in the garage!’

Sixth, choose to see mistakes and rejections as opportunities to learn. View a failure as the conclusion of one performance, not the end of your entire career. Own up to your shortcomings, but refuse to see yourself as a failure. A failure may be something you have done — and it may even be something you'll have to do again on the way to success — but a failure is definitely not something you are.

Even if you're at a point where you're feeling very negatively about yourself, be aware that you're now ideally positioned to make rapid and dramatic improvement. A negative self-evaluation, if it's honest and insightful, takes much more courage and character than the self-delusions that underlie arrogance and conceit. I've seen the truth of this proven many times in my work with athletes. After an extremely poor performance, a team or an individual athlete often does much better the next time out, especially when the poor performance was so bad that there was simply no way to shirk responsibility for it. Disappointment, defeat, and even apparent failure are in no way permanent conditions unless we choose to make them so. On the contrary, these undeniably painful experiences can be the solid foundation on which to build future success.

-- by Denis Waitley (excerpted from The Psychology of Motivation)

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Put up the dream. Put in the knowledge. Put out the effort.

The two greatest fear busters are knowledge and action.

You can't concentrate on the reverse of an idea. A fear is a goal moving in the opposite direction from your desire.

We can change if we want to.

Think of your imagination as a skill rather than a talent and learn to use it.

Motivation is an inner force that compels behavior. Your inner drives will propel you further and faster than external perks.


It's not the experience of today that causes us the most stress, it's the regret for something we didn't do yesterday.

Motivation is motive in action.

The most important opinion you'll ever have is the one you hold of yourself.

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The most successful business leaders today are like great coaches who manage by inspiration, instead of intimidation. The command and control, management style is obsolete. In this fast forward global marketplace, there is no such distinction as superior and subordinate. The key to getting and staying on top is to provide a resilient, positive working environment. This requires that you "check your ego at the door" and that you seek alliances with others who may have different talents or strengths than you do. This is what synergy is all about.

David Ogilvy, founder of giant advertising agency, Ogilvy and Mather, used to give each new manager a Russian doll, which contained five progressively smaller dolls inside. A message inside the smallest one read: "If each of us hires people we consider smaller than ourselves, we shall become a company of dwarves. But if each of us hires people who are bigger than we are, we will become a company of giants."

To become a giant in the eyes of others, and to succeed in the 21st century, look up to those beneath you! Consider these action ideas as you lead your team:

1. Listen often and openly to what others say, and try to do so without prejudgment.
2. Don't put anyone off or be too busy to listen to and answer questions.
3. Use praise frequently and sincerely.
4. If you feel that criticism is warranted, do it in private, and make sure you say something encouraging after the reprimand.
5. Be firm and be fair. Don't meet with people in person or on the phone when you are angry. Exercise or take a walk first, then communicate when you are relaxed.
6. Don't be afraid or hesitant to share your concerns with others. Far better to discuss a molehill, then to wait until it festers into Mt. Everest.
7. Don't make rash promises and be consistent.
8. Whenever you are in a leadership role, focus your supervision on teaching effective habits and skills, not in pointing out mistakes.

Encourage everyone in both your personal and professional life to speak up and express their own ideas, even if you disagree with them.
-- Denis Waitley

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Life is a magnificent fertile garden plot given you to till, to plant, to nurture and to reap from. What you grow in your garden is your choice. How you respond to the process along the way also is your choice.

Your garden will never be in a state of perfection. It will always be in transition.

With the end of each season is the anticipation of the next. No one season is the best, not even harvest. It has its special joys and frequent challenges, just as each of the other seasons.

To everything there is a season and place under heaven. There is a magnificent rhythm and cycle to life.

Seed to sprout. Sprout to bloom. Bloom to blossom. Blossom to fruit. Fruit to seed.

Success is a process. It cycles again and again. How you use the cycles to produce what benefits your life and the lives of others is up to you.

(These quotes were taken from Denis Waitley's The Seeds of Greatness Treasury)

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